Towards the end of last year I fell into a slump personally and spiritually. I became a real couch potato, finishing work at 5pm heading to the lounge to watch TV until 10pm then sleep. Weekends were much the same get up, talk to mum play Simms watch TV etc. I could go for weeks without going out of the house, many weeks not even for church, although I did go to the YWAM meetings. Predictably this came to a head over the Christmas Holidays when I had 3 weeks of no work, and no one in the house other than me. Over this time God and my extroversion won out. God convicted me to go to spend more time with Him and to basically "Get a LIFE" wow what a wake up call!!
This led to the challenge of what to do with my Christmas money, I struggled a lot with the decision as for months I had been planning to spend it on an ipod touch, but felt convicted that I should join the gym. I struggled a lot with God, but of course arguing with God can only end one way - Him winning! so I saw reason and signed up for 6 months at the gym, and have thoroughly enjoyed going, in fact tonight we have the first parents meeting so I am not able to go to the gym and I am actually disappointed! Not only has the gym enabled me to start getting fit, I am getting out of the house everyday and I am watching less TV, now when I do watch TV it is guilt free :) I have also met some nice people.
My friend Angela sent me some good Christian books for Christmas, which have helped me get out of my spiritual slump and I have started going back to Church more regularly and with the YWAM meetings being moved to Fridays I am now able to go back to the English Bible Study group I used to go to in my first year here. God has opened doors for me both at church and the bible study to meet knew people and hopefully develop more friendships here outside of YWAM. I have also committed to deepening the friendships I have in YWAM. I have arranged with the other 3 native English speaking women to meet up once a month for a drink and chat and am being more proactive in inviting other people out either for a drink or the cinema, acknowledging that this will mean me paying most of the time as Colombian missionaries are not well supported financially.
So in all, over the last month since Christmas, I have turned my life around 180 degrees and am really enjoying it, and I think God is too as this week, after much nagging me, he allowed me to purchase an Ipod Touch. Thanks to some generous donations I had a bit to spare on the tax payout I got and felt a peace about buying it, but fought against it, it is too expensive, and anyway I dont need one, I have my mp3 player, it is broken but it works! then no sooner had I said that that it broke, a couple of other co-incidents like this later and I found myself in the shop with card in hand, now I have never bought anything here on my card, normally I only withdraw cash and then use it over the month, due to bank charges, my card is only accepted by like 2 cash machines here so I didnt expect it to be expected and indeed prayed "If you really want me to buy this then let it go through" and indeed it did :) I really felt God was teaching me the truth about the well known verse "seek first the kingdom of God and His Righteousness and all these things will be added unto you" (ok that is a quote from the song, but it is in the bible!)
In the last couple of days since having the ipod I have downloaded a bible app which has daily devotionals which I have been doing every day, I have downloaded all of my home churches podcasts and listening to them in the mornings while getting ready, also I have an app that is helping me to calorie count so hopefully the weight loss will begin too!
but my question is: why is it so hard for us to accept God is telling us He wants to give us something we WANT rather than NEED? There are plenty of verses in the bible that say he wants to give "good gifts" or the "desires of your heart" I hope that from now on in I will be more open to hear the good things not just the telling off from God!! I hope you will too :D
God Bless
Petra
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